As the twins get older, annoying things aren't happening to me as much (see 2008 posts). Yes, I get asked if they are twins every day, but it's a more reasonable question now that Evan is an inch taller and meatier. No one is trying to touch them. No one is standing in my way staring without saying anything. I'm not even being told I'm blessed anymore.
No, as they get older, I'm finding a new phenomenon: Other twin moms lying to me. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's just the women in my area. Maybe they're delusional. All I know is that I have twins and love to talk to other twin moms about what they are going through. I get nothing. Blank stares in the headlights, fake smiles, and an extra spring in their step to show me just how wonderful they are doing.
Here are a few things that have happened lately:
Scenario 1- The Perfect Twins
ME: to a mom with 11 months old girl twins: "Are you getting any sleep yet?"
HER: "Yes, they've been sleeping through the night since 3 months."
ME: internal eye roll.
ME: "Were they born early?"
HER: "No, they are actually big and perfectly healthy." Walks away and doesn't even want a conversation.
You know why this is total BS? Because I met her at a therapy playgroup for babies with development delays!! Don't tell me your twins are perfect and you have a perfect life when your babies won't eat and have sensory issues! Talk to me, I'm a mother of twins, I have friends with twins who might have some of the same problems. You don't have to be perfect for me, jeez.
Scenario 2- The Walking Dead
ME: to a mom with 1 month old twins: "Are you getting any sleep yet?"
HER: "Oh yeah, they are on a schedule already."
ME: I let out a little evil laugh as she pushed them out of the elevator.
BS!!! Your hair looks like birds are living it and you have giant purple circles under your eyes! You rolled in and out of the elevator in a complete daze! Great, they are on a schedule. So you are up every three hours with them together- you are still up every three hours. Don't lie to me! Your are freaking tired and your world is in complete chaos!
Scenario 3- The 2yr Olds Who Don't Run
ME: to a mom with 2 yr old twins: "Wow, you're brave walking through the store without a stroller."
HER: "They are really good at not running from me, they always stick right by my side."
ME: internal "You've got to be kidding me. That's amazing if it's true."
HER: "Let's go girls, we've got to get home." She opens the door and they both take off running toward the parking lot at 50mph.
Liar, liar, liar!!!
I'm not understanding why these women are lying to me. I've never kept how hard it is to have twins a secret to anyone. Other mothers understand, even mothers with one or more single babies.
Right now, I'm thinking it is the area I live in. I've never run into this before. I keep trying to make friends and no one is interested. Poor me, right? No way, I'm thinking poor them. Because I'm fantastic :)
2 comments:
It's the area. Maybe if you wore birkenstocks and walked around with a camelback and had a "life is good" t shirt on they would talk to you. However, I would rather shoot myself in the face. You'll be outta there soon. Hang in there.
Um... Yeah, I call total BS on them too! And lady in scenario #1 can suck it, she's a dumba$$ for shooting you down. Though maybe the one with the one month olds on a schedule just said it because she's so tired and used to trying to keep up appearances that she was on auto-reply.
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