Birthday from Daddy’s Perspective Part 2.

Immediately after the births of Evan and Amelia, my life became a complete blur. I had absolutely no concept of time passing or even what time of day it was. I don’t even remember looking at a clock for at least a day or two. The account that follows is my recollection of those events as remembered almost three weeks after the fact. The one thing that I remember vividly is that I received zero sleep the first night and slightly more than that on the second night. Therefore, my state of mind at the time can be described as borderline delirium. I am being a little sarcastic but the accuracy of the following statements, although believed to be factual, cannot be independently verified. This is because my only witness was watching me in a drug-induced euphoria while suffering from severe anemia due to the loss of over a liter of blood during the surgery - that’s roughly three cans of coke, yum!!-. This confuses me because I read that a pregnant woman has excess blood in her uterus and it is normal for a woman to lose up to a liter of blood during a c-section. I also read that the excess blood in the uterus acts as a pseudo transfusion to offset the blood loss incurred during child birth. I know nobody cares but I feel compelled to cite my reference for this info. I read it on the World Anesthesia online magazine (http://www.nda.ox.ac.uk/wfsa/html/u09/u09_003.htm.) Apparently this was not the case with Jenni, because she was being monitored closely for a potential blood transfusion. I was scared for the first couple of days because she did not look well at all. Her face and lips were a ghostly white color as were her hands. Her pulse was twice the normal level and her blood pressure was extremely low. It was around 80/60 and normal is 120/80. They were waking her up every couple of hours to take her vitals but I will let her describe that to you in her post. In the end, she did not need a transfusion and now she has her color back and is doing much better.

Previously on “Birthday from Daddy’s Perspective” da dun..da dun …

“So I finally picked her up and we took them to the recovery room and they both received baths while they closed Jenni up.”

The following takes place between 9am and 10am……and on….. and on …..and is still ongoing. (if you have never seen the TV show 24, ignore this part.)

Evan Charles Harrop and Amelia Jeanne Harrop were born at the National Naval Medical Center in Bethesda, Maryland at 9:04am and 9:05 am, respectively, on January 09, 2008. After their baths, the Navy Hospital Corpsman gave me a crash course in baby care 101. The first thing I noticed was Evan staring at me. The picture that you see was taken less than 30 minutes after he was born. He was very alert and attentive immediately. The Corpsman instructed me as she put a diaper on each one of them. I think they made a mistake and tried to put adult diapers on them because they were huge and the babies were literally falling out of their diapers. After a brief interlude, the Corpsman returned with preemie diapers that fit better but were still a little loose. The preemie diapers were 2 sizes smaller than the one’s that were pre-stocked in the bassinets so I guess our babies were well below the average birth weight for that hospital.
Their combined weight was slightly less than 10 pounds, and the larger diapers fit babies from 8-14 pounds. I was thinking that since they shared a womb for 37 weeks that they wouldn’t mind sharing a diaper, but I didn’t have to test this theory because the Corpsman brought smaller diapers. We brought diapers as well but they were the size in between the previously stated diapers so they were also too big. OK enough about diapers already! After the diaper situation was resolved, the Corpsman showed me how to swaddle the babies in receiving blankets. I’ve gotten better at this but they looked pretty ragged at first. (There was another Corpsman that worked the night shift that would come in every few hours to check their vitals. When he was finished, he would rap them tighter than a burrito, so we gave them the nickname baby burritos.) Next she pulled out two needles and gave one of the babies a shot (Note: I don’t remember which baby got the first shot, I think it was Evan but I am not sure. This is not due to the delirium or lack of sleep because it is still too early for that. It is due to the fact that I was still in a daze from the experience of being a dad for the first/second time.) After she administered the first shot, and before she secured the safety mechanism on the needle that helps avoid pointy little accidents, she dropped the needle. I gasped because it landed right near the foot of my 10 minute old child. Again, I don’t remember which child. But, I do remember that it was the baby that did not get the shot. I politely exclaimed, “please be careful around my babies!” although that is not what I was thinking. She said, “um... yeah… ok” or something like that. To her credit, she performed the shot on the remaining baby with the utmost care and concentration.

I don’t remember how long it took for them to finish closing Jenni up, but it seemed like a very long time. I am not sure, but I would estimate that it was close to an hour before she left the operating room. This is where my thoughts get a little jumbled. I started out in a recovery room and ended up in a family suite with Jenni and the babies. I don’t remember how or when I left the recovery room and went to the suite. I remember leaving a small suitcase and two pillows that we brought from home in the recovery room that ended up in the suite. I don’t know if I brought them myself or had help and I don’t remember who wheeled the babies into the suite. I also don’t remember if Jenni came to the recovery room or went straight to the suite. Maybe she can clarify this. Anyway, the setup at the hospital for new mothers and their babies is different than I have seen in the past. Some people would like this setup while others would not. Personally, I like the way it is setup. First of all, there is no nursery in the hospital. New mothers are given a private suite. It is the size of an average motel room, and it has a private bathroom. The babies stay in the room with the mother at all times, and they have electronic ankle bracelets that trigger alarms if they leave the maternity ward. These bracelets did not stay attached because both babies lost weight and the bracelets just slipped off of their ankles. Most of the medical personal did not care when I brought this up. The doctors and nurses could care less. I was on a military base so I felt comfortable that they were safe. I did keep mentioning it though and finally after several hours, a Corpsman put the bracelets back on. They slipped off again after a few hours so I gave up. The room also has a loveseat that is a foldout bed for daddy to sleep on. I use the words bed and sleep very loosely in this instance. It would make a decent bed if you are 4 feet tall, but if not it is kind of cramped. The foldout bed was about as long as the loveseat was wide. I was able to get a little more room by lying diagonal but I didn’t get much sleep anyway so the point is moot. It was more like a small amount of 20 to 30 minute powernaps. The first day was just me running around like a madman. I was trying to take care of Evan and Amelia while helping Jenni out as well because she could not get up. Every couple of hours I had to change them and help Jenni hold them to feed them. This usually became a two hour evolution to get the both of them changed, fed, and back to sleep. Then I would get a quick break and have to do it all over again. Morning, afternoon, and evening melded together because I was doing the same thing over and over.

The next day was more of the same. I had the same clothes on and I did not have the time or presence of mind to change or clean myself up. My shirt had baby puke smeared all over the shoulder, and I’m sure the doctors and nurses thought I was a mess. I wore this shirt for the rest of the day and finally the next morning I decided that I had to take the time and take care of my hygienic needs. The only items I took from home were a razor/shaving cream and toothbrush/toothpaste. No soap or shampoo. Not to worry though, there is a soap dispenser hanging in the bathroom filled with hospital grade antibacterial soap. If anyone has washed their hands in a hospital, you are probably cringing right now because you know that if the ancient Egyptians had access to this stuff, they would use it in their mummification process. This stuff completely gets rid of even the minutest traces of moisture on your skin. So I brush my teeth and shave and I take a styrofoam cup and fill it with the liquid desiccant that is hanging on the wall and use it to wash myself in the shower. Wow, what a difference a shower and a shave makes. I felt like a million bucks. I no longer felt or smelled like a homeless person and felt more comfortable talking to the doctors. This euphoria was short-lived however. Within minutes, I felt the skin tightening around my face and it started to burn. I found a tube of hand lotion in Jenni’s purse and I doused my face with it. This brought instant relief and an all new state of euphoria. Life was good but there was still one more problem. I had not eaten much of anything for quite a long time and it was catching up with me. So I politely excuse myself and say I am going to the Dunkin Donuts that is located inside the hospital to get a coffee. In addition to the coffee, I got a Sausage, egg, and cheese croissant that I inhaled in about ten seconds. Jenni could only eat crackers, so I did not want to bring it to the room and eat in front of her. I went back to the room to continue the changing/feeding ritual for several more hours.

One thing that made the whole experience even more difficult was all the interruptions. There was the nurse that had to check on Jenni every few hours and give her medicine and check her vitals. There were the OB doctors that also had to periodically check on her well-being. There were the pediatricians that had to check on the babies. Then there were also the Corpsmen that had to monitor the babies, and the cleaning personnel that emptied out the trash. The Corpsmen also had to empty the dirty laundry and the medical waste receptacles. As you can imagine, this amounted to a great deal of interruptions, and they all came at different times. I remember that a Corpsman came in every night at midnight to weigh the babies and check their temperature and blood pressure. Then they came back at 4:30 am to empty the laundry and medical waste. As I said earlier, the doctors were worried that Jenni would need a transfusion so they had to monitor her even closer. There was one instance at about 1:00 am when I had just fallen asleep after getting the babies to fall asleep and Jenni called my name. I got right up and was standing in front of her but I was only half awake and I could not comprehend what she was saying. I had the presence of mind to understand this fact though. At first I just stared at her and then I said “wait a minute, I can’t not understand what is going on; I need to wake up first.” It took a minute or two, but I came out of the fog and found out that Evan was crying and I picked him up and got him to go back to sleep. It is very weird, but I have a vivid memory of standing there in front of Jenni and not comprehending what is going on. I guess that’s what happens to the human body/mind from lack of sleep. My reaction time slowed down to minutes instead of milliseconds. I don’t think that I would have been able to safely drive a car at that point and I was thinking about that. I even mentioned to Jenni that I did not feel safe driving the babies home on the D.C. Beltway unless I got some sleep. By the third day Jenni was able to move around a little and actually pick up the babies. So I got enough rest to where I was able to drive home on the fourth day.









Evan and Amelia in their going home outfits.




Coming Soon ……. Our first days home from the hospital.

Freedom!!!!

Yes, "Freeedom!", as in the movie Braveheart. If you are squeamish turn away now. I wanted to write about the C-section from my point of view because I was absolutely dreading it and it did not disappoint in the least.

I wanted to try and have a natural childbirth because my sister and mother did and I was up for a new challenge. They insisted it was a piece of cake. "Just listen to your body" and "redheads have a high pain threshold", they told me time and again. So when my babies were breach, I had to finally deal with being sliced open. I put it off in my mind until I actually had to deal with it on C day.

As we walked into the hospital, I was already shaking uncontrollably. The shaking continued all the way through the surgery. First, they hooked me up to an IV and got me ready to go. I still do not know if they put some drugs in my IV before I walked to the OR, but I was a little out of it as I got up on the table for the epidural. My thinking is that there were some drugs involved because I was unable to argue with the doctor who was so kindly holding my hand in the overheated room. Can you believe this doctor made ignorant geography comments during this trying time? He was trying to keep me calm, so he asked me what I went to school for. Upon hearing "geography", he then chose this time to ask me how many continents there were and if I could name them. My teeth chattering, I told him, but I really wanted to explain to him that there is a little more to geography than that. Imagery analysis? Computer cartography? No, naming the freaking continents! (For those who are non-geographers, this is what we geographers have to deal with on a daily basis.) He then thought it would be funny to say that he thought Greenland was a continent. Wow. I know he was joking, but was this doctor belittling me? I couldn't argue due to the shivering and drugs. I think OR doctors use this time to get their chuckles.

It really was kind of a party in there. My OR nurse and anesthesiologist were yucking it up all morning. The OR nurse was Hispanic and I was to call her Dora. The anesthesiologist was Korean and I was to call him Doctor-San. They said it was an equal opportunity racial humor OR. I asked him if he had any good Norwegian jokes, but he did not. The anesthesiologist, after punching John, proceded to pinch me hard to explain how it would feel. He kept asking, "does this hurt? does this hurt?" I told him yes it did, even though he wanted me to say no.

Back to the OR, the epidural did not hurt. I do have a high tolerance for pain and it was a lot less of a deal than I expected. When I was ready to go and paralyzed, they put up the sheet below my head so John and I couldn't see what was going on. But guess what? The shiny metal piece around the light fixture above my head showed my entire belly when I looked up! I could see them scrubbing me down. What a nightmare. I would have said something, but what would be the point. Maybe I was morbidly curious anyway. I kept glancing at my belly. I heard the surgeons say they were starting the incision. John wasn't even by me yet! Someone said, "Is someone going to get Dad?" In comes John and I'm shaking uncontrollably. You would never know he was scared. He was perfect in there with me.

So the bad part? They aren't kidding when they tell you that you will feel some tugging. OMG. I can't believe how much ripping out was involved. I didn't know it would take as much ripping and time as it did. I could hear the tearing within my body. I was making "uh" noises as they tugged. Blood spurted everywhere with one of the tugs. A drop landed on my forehead! I remember laughing at this because, who else would something like that happen to? This is the kind of thing that only happens to me. Finally I heard Evan out, then Amelia. It was so hot in there and I was so delirious, but thankfully I remember most of it. I remember joking with the anesthesiologist about John not cutting the cord. I secretly knew he would once he was pressured into it.

So that was the surgery. Maybe it doesn't sound all that bad now. The following days were very painful. I could barely move until I realized that two percocets at a time worked very well. I was also emotionally spent. Watching John do everything for two babies for three days straight was very trying. The Navy hospital does not have a nursery and they do not help care for the infants. He also helped me get food and get out of bed.

Later on, on the first day, I still had low blood pressure and a racing pulse. I learned that I lost a liter of blood that morning. Two different doctors came in and told me that redheads bleed more. Well, my mom and sister never told me about that! So we can start a bar fight at an Irish pub and go down swinging, but if we get cut by a bottle- it's all over! Anyway, at one point it was thought I needed a transfusion, but I warded it off by putting on rouge to disguise my yellow skin. (Not really.) Ya know how your hands have multiple tones to them? I had one tone in my hands and my skin all over: yellow.

Hopped up on percocets, I managed to get discharged and settled in at home with the babies. Haven't had more than two hours sleep since!

Birthday from daddy’s perspective Part 1.

Let’s start with the night before the birth. It was the last night of uninterrupted sleep (kind of) that I have had. I say kind of because, first of all, I was anxious about Jenni undergoing surgery and extremely excited to finally meet my son and daughter after so much anticipation. We also had to get up at 4:00 am in order to make the 1.5 to 2 hour trek on the D.C. Beltway to the Naval Hospital in Bethesda Maryland. So needless to say, I did not get much sleep the night before Evan and Amelia were born. So my actual last night of uninterrupted sleep was the night before the night before their births. Did I mention that it has been two weeks since they were born? Let me just say that this is the “single” most challenging, and at the same time rewarding, endeavor that I have ever undertaken in my 32 plus years on this planet. I hardly got any sleep for two and a half months when I went to boot camp, but that seems like a piece of cake when I look back and compare it to taking care of my two little bundles of joy. And oh-by-the-way, I have to go back to work in less than a week. That’s when the real challenge begins.

Ok, let’s get to all the gory details of the surgery…

We got to the hospital at around 6:00 am (we knew on Monday that she would have a C-section on Wednesday but did not tell anybody because we wanted it to be a surprise.) They took us into a room for initial admitting. They handed Jenni a gown and told her to go in the restroom, take everything off and put it on…. Easier said than done! 15 minutes go by and I start to wonder if she got cold feet and ran away because, theoretically, it should take less than 5 minutes to don the hospital gown. So I knock on the restroom door and ask her if everything is ok. She says yes but she can’t figure out which side of the gown is the front. I asked her if she wanted my help, but her fierce independence and ego would not allow it and she vowed that she was going to figure it out on her own. To her credit, 10 minutes later, she walked out of the restroom with the gown perfectly affixed to her body. Some time goes by and then the anesthesiologist comes in to meet her and discuss the spinal she would be receiving. This doctor seemed a little wacky. Not in an incompetent way though. He sounded like he knew what he was talking about, but what do I know about doctor speak? He may have been a crazy person that just stayed at a Holiday Inn Express the night before. It was kind of funny when he was explaining what Jenni would feel when they were slicing and dicing her innards. He said that she would feel pressure but it would not hurt. Then he proceeded to punch me in the shoulder several times to demonstrate this point. He said “see, he feels it but it doesn’t hurt him.” Then I dropped him with a Bruce Lee kick to the jaw (just kidding.) He kept reiterating to me that I MUST sit down in the operating room and I could not be there during the insertion of the spinal catheter. Apparently, he explained, some poor dude passed out when he saw the doctor apply the spinal and smacked his head on a metal pipe and died and his wife sued and got a bunch of money and ruined the experience for the rest of us.

Finally, the big moment arrives. They are wheeling her into the operating room to apply the spinal. I have to wait until this is done before I can go into the OR. Her bed is stopped outside the recovery room and a nurse tells me to go with her and she will show me where to put the suitcase and pillows that we packed during surgery. Then they wheeled Jenni away. I did not get to say good luck or break a leg or anything before she went into the OR. The nurse hands me a painter’s suit, booties, a mask and head cover and I put everything on (see pic) and wait... and wait… and wait. Actually, it was only about 25 minutes but it seemed like an eternity. I was a wreck. Finally, a nurse escorts me into the OR and guides me towards Jenni’s head where the anesthesiologist is standing and he hands me a seat and orders me to sit down. I comply. Then he hands me a shallow crescent shaped dish and says to “use it if I feel nauseous.” I did not need it, but if I did it would have been ugly. Picture yourself with your head 2 inches from the floor. Now picture yourself throwing up. Not a pretty picture is it? You just gave yourself an imaginary puke facial and that’s what would have happened to me if I would have used this shot glass sized barf bowl. I guess that’s why doctors are so specialized. They cannot multi-task. This doctor only knows how to manage anesthesia. He can’t help you with other medical problems so I guess it is too much of a stretch for him to contemplate someone actually puking in the Petri dish and realize that it will not suffice.

Anyway, here we are in the operating room and Jenni is being opened up. She keeps shivering uncontrollably and it is kind of freaking me out but she says she feels fine and the doctor says that it is normal. I was still not completely comfortable with the shaking but I tried not to show it. I just kept telling her that she was doing fine and to breathe. When I was in there, it was all very surreal and a blur. It seems like it is taking forever but I really had no sense of time. I kept thinking where are the babies? It is much quicker on TV. After several minutes, there was a pretty good sized blood splatter that left a big splat on the blue sheet that was hanging in front of her head. However, this sheet was not high enough to deflect all of the blood. Several drops flew over the sheet and landed on the screen of the equipment monitoring her vitals and on the sheet of paper that the anesthesiologist was using to log her vitals and times. He wiped it off the paper but it left a nice brown/red streak and turned the paper into a biohazard. True to his form, he jokingly exclaimed, you don’t have a disease or scabies do you? Oh! And a nice big drop landed square on her forehead. To her credit, this little incident did not disturb Jenni in the least. She just said hey blood splattered on my forehead and that was it.

Eons go by and finally at 9:04 am, we hear a baby crying and the doctor says there’s one of them “I see a little butt.” I was somewhat in shock but I told Jenni that that was Evan crying and she cried and said his name, “Evan.” I thought I was going to cry but I think I was too much in shock to cry. Then a minute later, we heard another baby crying and I told Jenni that that was Amelia and she cried and said her name, “Amelia.” Ok now it hits me. They are born now. How are they? Are they healthy? How is his arm? Etc… A million questions are going through my head. What seems like several minutes go by. It could have been 2 or 20, like I said, I really had no sense of time. Then the nurse came and escorted me to the babies and the doctor showed me Evan first. He was amazing to look at for the first time. I thought Wow, what a beautiful baby! Then I saw his arm and thought that it was not as bad as I had expected. The good news is that other than his arm, he appeared to be normal. We did suspect a heart defect though and found out later that he does have a moderate VSD in his heart that may or may not close up. Let’s hope for the best!

Then the doctor told me that I could cut the umbilical cord if I would like. I said that I absolutely would not like to cut the cord. I was feeling squeamish and did not feel like I had it in me. Then another doctor said that I would regret it for the rest of my life if I did not cut the cord. So I said what the heck, give me those scissors. It was kind of gross. Blood splattered everywhere. But looking back, I am glad that I decided to do it. Next the doctor escorted me over to Amelia and I got to see her for the first time. I thought, I can’t believe it, lightening strikes twice! Two beautiful babies! She was this perfect little baby with the cutest little button nose. I cut her cord and went back to Jenni and told her that they were beautiful. After a minute the nurses brought each baby over for Jenny to see and she cried each time. I was still numb and in awe of the fact that I was a dad for the first and second time. I didn’t realize until later that I could have seen her open belly with her guts spread out across the operating table. All I had to do was look right but I was too much in shock to realize it. Not that I would want to see that but just like a car crash how could you not look if it was right in front of you. The Nurse asked me to take Amelia and she would take Evan to the recovery room. At just over 5 pounds, she was a tiny little thing. So it took me a minute to figure out how to grab her and pick her up. I was afraid that I would crush her. So I finally picked her up and we took them to the recovery room and they both received baths while they closed Jenni up. Sorry about the long windedness but I wanted to be thorough. I have told the story leading up to their birth.

Part 2 coming soon… The experience of taking care of twins on their first day of life.

How did that happen?

Baby Videos!

Evan and Amelia

Evan Charles and Amelia Jeanne (pronounced Zhen, like Zsa Zsa) were born non-au naturale last week on Jan. 9th. I will save all that birthing drama for another entry. They are absolutely unbelievable. Their personalities are exactly what I thought they would be.

Evan loves to stare at you and take everything in around him. Very observant. He has my hair, but even more red (I was born with red hair). I love it!! He has his dad's eyes for sure. He makes random noises that crack us up. Sometimes it's like he is yelling "HEY!" I never think about his arm. It is not as shocking or short as I thought it would be. He is so sweet, I can tell he will be very caring. He eats very slowly and methodically until he is full.



Amelia loves to eat and constantly move around. Her arms and legs go at full speed. She lifts her head up and can roll from side to side. She can shimmy out of every blanket she is swaddled in. We just can't keep her arms inside. When she relaxes, she's goes completely limp, with her arms above her head and her legs stretched out. This and her funny faces make her dad laugh hysterically. Then I laugh at her dad. After a week of this, we are delirious, though. She eats like a little piggy and won't stop until she pukes. We've learned to stop her before that happens now.



John and I are tired most of the time, but have managed to finally watch the news and send out pictures. We finally went out with them yesterday. We took them to Walter Reed for their first checkup. But their first official outing would be where else? Target! We stopped on the way home. Mom and dad love Target (who doesn't?), so it was very appropriate. A lot of people stopped us to look at them or tell us a story about someone they knew with twins and the adventures they had. We might try to get out again soon. Before they stop sleeping so much! One thing to note is that when one of them cries or screams, the other one- they sleep next to each other- does not even flinch. I don't know how they ignore each other. I have heard that having twins sleep near each other can be a problem because they wake each other up. Not these guys. I will have to get some video of that.

37 Weeks

Perhaps my last belly picture...

No Au Naturale??

Well, we went to the doctor's yesterday. They are both measuring in at 5 lbs, 10 ozs. I thought for sure they would be 6 lbs. That's using ultrasound, though, so who knows. I feel like they must be coming soon. My fingers and feet are a little "puffy", to say the least. Unfortunately, Baby A is still breech, so it's almost a guarantee that I am having a C section. I don't want surgery, but I am going to just be happy if I have two healthy babies at the end of it. I'm trying not to think about the surgery until I'm laying there and then hopefully I won't care!

McRib Sandwich

Why are they both trying to get under my ribs? I think someone kicked a lung yesterday. Supposedly Baby A should be down low by now, getting ready for the big escape. He's going the wrong way! He is also still feet first. If only I had gotten him a GPS for Christmas: "Go South 5 inches. Turn over. Exit." Of course he's not going to ask for directions (men).

But seriously, I am so excited for them to come out. I can't wait anymore! I just want to hold them and everything else. Good and bad- or should I say icky? Can't wait. But I will because it is for the best. These babies are going to be huge! For twins, anyway.